Saturday, June 27, 2009

In-law Drama

So, just a little over 4 months, we have in-law drama.

Mr. G's parents live on the east coast. Mrs. G's parent lives on the west, but south. Both of us live in the PNW. This means the phone is our best form of communication next to flying out to each respective home.

When we got married, a few days before the wedding we had a brunch with all the parents together. This was right before Mrs. G's mother became quite ill and why most of my wedding pictures have her looking unhappy. In fact, the comment made by her in regards to my new mother-in-law, "Boy, she looks like your real mom."

At Christmas time before wedding and at Fathers day, my mother has sent gifts as a way to say hello and work through the distance gap.

Well, the only way she's heard about their liking the things she's sent is through us. No thank you card or phone call has been returned. This has now rubbed my mother the wrong way and we now get to play mediator.

I tried to tell her it was nothing they have a 24/7 job position and its hard to get those things taken care of. I even mentioned how when we last talked to Mr. G's parents about Christmas in 2010 if we are then living on the east coast to have her fly up and stay with them.

Do I see a favoritism with family? Yes...I do. We call Mr. G's parents more during each week. I talk with my mother-in-law more in comparison with how often my husband talks with my mother.

Its difficult when I do not share the same values as my mother does. She doesn't know of the same love I know to be what love is. Her heart is big and love language gifts. Care packages are her way of saying she misses you. As much as I love these gifts, its hard to not feel guilty about my future plans.

They say you have two shots at a great family.....the one you're born into and the one you marry. The one I've married into is my attempt to change my life 180 degrees. Change, but not to leave out.

So how does one help bridge the gap when two families live miles apart?

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