Friday, November 20, 2009

Why does this model dating so much?

For most women, there comes a time where they say goodbye to the dating antics and hello to steady married life. I did that 9 months ago tomorrow. No longer did I have to search dating websites or make sure I looked pretty in case Mr. Right was scheduled to fall in my lap. And no more 1st awkward dates to coffee and waiting by the phone for a return date.

So why do I feel this same anxiety as a married woman?????

This reason would be the fact that starting this fall, we've been on a ministry team search to get us moved to the east coast. And like the dating sites, we've combed through a certain one to look for postings that would provide jobs for us both at the same time. One particular attractive one came up and we were found to be of interest to it.

Let the games begin!

What a roller coaster it was on my emotions. First off, we were coming to the end of our apartment lease where we could leave and not pay a stiff penalty, so better make use of it! My current job has been cut to permanent part time and Mr. G hasn't been able to catch a break at work in getting promoted to a new job within in over a year of trying.

This team position would have a huge reduction in cost of living. Also putting us at the middle point of family with 6 hours drive in either direction. Then throw on top of being near 4 major cities, 3 states and Canada. Not to mention also being able to rent a house! I was like Ralphie gazing at the Red Rider BB Gun.....wishing and hoping we would be given this opportunity. We interviewed, got positive feedback from other higher up that we had a good shot. Throw in some other "date" getting sick, delaying the dating process and much deliberation on their end.

.....Now we know we've been dumped for someone else. Arg! And what burns my cheese the most is they made an assumption about us without asking us first hand, and letting "family" have WAY too much control in the decision!

I was emotionally exhausted after all this. Dreams crushed and left wondering when the storm will pass in this season of life. Feeling rather stupid for letting myself get caught on a cloud that this would come through and solve and further complicate my life in figuring out how to move in the winter across the state and find housing with less than a month to do it all.....I have to be more cautious in the future.

Low and behold, a few days later we finally get something on the stove again after wondering if anything official would happen after exchanging our profiles (resumes) to be deemed worthy or not of a phone date.

I will NOT let the same thing happen again! I have to keep my feet on the ground until there is an offer on the table. I don't want to sound jaded from this process, but I feel less confident on this possibility than the other. This requires me to not even mention what this possibility is so I do not build myself up in hopes, much like talking to your girlfriends about a guy you're interested in.

A blessing though.....we were able to go month-to-month on our apartment lease without an increase in rent! This gives us the freedom to continue our search in the east without the same worry of what financial consequences we would have to face.